Reddit: Suck My Balls

Until today, I had NEVER once been on the internet site Reddit. Until today I didn't realize how fucking RETARDED the mental development of the plebian masses really is. I've made fun of you before for being an idiot, I've harped and railed (and even used that exact term before about the collective's seemingly bottomless stupidity). I've quoted Einstein on this topic. I thought it was bad, I have now learned it so much worse.

I'm sure there are anime fanboy and/or MLPony sites filled with more miserable, child like bickering and idiocy but that we've come to expect that of insane nerds. When did the populace at large learn to match the general shittiness of subhuman, antisocial internet weirdos? Further, where are the battle axe weilding defenders of human dignity to quell the pernicious oozings of waste humanity?

 

 

 

You came to Reddit for actual news....?

I saw a thread in which some dummy was arguing for the fact of climate change based on the amount of scientific articles he found on the internet and lambasted his would be enemies with the fact that they only quoted a blog in their defense.

First things first: doctors used to have a consensus that bleeding pints of blood out of people was good for them. Obviously a transient human consensus means nothing: in four hundred years people will be laughing at our savage 'modern' scientific 'truths' and you will be an idiot by consensus.

Secondly: climate change is agreed upon by all climate scientists. Here's how fucking retarded you are: scientists understand that the Earth's climate has never, at any time, remained static; insofar as the Earth's climate changes. So, yes, they all agree on that. What you are woefully unaware of is that the climate change you refer to is the idiotic notion that humans generate enough energy to modify Earth climate with their waste and, no, not all climate scientists agree on that - because it doesn't add up physically.

Why does this site even exist? What function does it serve for humanity? I mean you must have literally nothing else to do to be reading this prattle. Complete and utter garbage.

Imagine if I had a blog that just put pictures of my dog and put some stupid caption on them? You'd be pissed right? I fucking hope you're smart enough to be angry at the fact we finally get internet back after thousands of years and THIS is what we use it for. You have more important things to be doing with your life - like immediately ending it for pissing me and countless others off with your inane bullshit.

If you're, like, in to 'funny' pet pictures - you should suck flourine too. Humans should be building free energy spacecraft, constructing artificial planets and  generally doing shit that is imbued with a god-like awesomeness quotient. I'm sure we've all heard some pathetic waste say: "humans are a disease on this planet" you know what? They are! All of the people who say that are in fact a disease, those of us who reply: "speak for yourself" are not. Humans are fucking awesome - we are the most awesome thing we've ever discovered - our powers are virtually unlimited and reddit is what we are spending the very limited time of our lives on??? It's like winning the lotto and spending all the cash on Smurfs memorabilia.

Even funnier is the absolute shit notion that man needs to be improved upon! With machines no less!

Can we make a human (I mean make not copy)? Has anyone ever made a human? Did we make the materials? Atoms? Gravity? Electricity? Anything ever? Nope. So what makes you think that the design given to us by whatever force created EVERYTHING IN THE UNIVERSE, could possibly be faulty? Or that you could improve on it in any way without being able to create anything from nothing?

This is as stupid as Mary Shelly speculating that her 'modern'  science could reanimate dead humans, 'it's just a few years off'. We still can't do that and it's been like 150 years. We always think 'we're just on the brink' of being god via scientism and we keep ignoring the fact that we continually fail. People have been indoctrinated to think that their age is always the most advanced one, the one in which true progress is king and will usher in a new world of unbridled awesomeness. How many have actually been right? Further if you extrapolate this into today's world, how likely are we to be 'right'?

To me it seems that with each passing century we get fatter, dumber and lazier. Here we have an eighth grade exam from 1895. Since I didn't go to eighth grade in any physical or literal sense I have no idea what it is like in the modern era but, having spoken with many people who have  graduated this grade, I can't expect more than our modern exam being something like: "watch this episode of 'Breaking Bad' and tell us what color pants the protagonist wore".

Oh and apparently some people disagree with my 'we've turned into a bunch of chimps' idea. With retorts like "not at all" and "Snopes.com, a widely used online fact-checking website, agrees." (with "not at all") I'm sure you'll be able to see how their eighth grade educations have benefitted their ability to cogently form and communicate ideas to others. Or perhaps it indicates the intelligence of the readers? Maybe it's a clear indicator that we are a bunch of hyperdangerous ultramorons. If anyone was smart enough: they'd likely agree. (burned: salina.com, snope.com and teachers + administrators of Salina County School District - suck my fucking balls retards!)

Put down reddit and go lift weights, feast, bang, drink, do drugs and destroy some useless political rape service like the AGLC. Or go do whatever it is that your actually into and if that thing happens to be reddit then kill yourself because it's obviously what you love doing.